Last night I started writing the first post for my new blog (no, it hasn't launched yet). A post that is deeply personal and will easily be the most terrifying post I'll ever push publish on. Then I stopped writing it because it made me want to throw-up. Seriously, the urge began to overwhelm me. And I'll tell you why that's a good thing.
Because it forces me to be uncomfortable.
I'm not referring to the type of discomfort brought on by bad underwear that keep riding up or dress shoes that pinch your toes. Those are external discomforts.
I'm referring to internal discomforts. The kind of terror that keeps you up at night, tossing and turning. The kind of terror that makes your palms sweaty and your knees weak. The kind of terror that makes you want to vomit all over yourself at the sheer thought of proceeding forward.
Perfect example, being stuck in a loveless marriage. Why doesn't the person leave? Because they're comfortable. Comfortable will keep you stuck. Stuck in a dead marriage. Stuck in a dead job. Stuck in a dead town. Stuck "living" a dead life!
Simply put, comfortable is bad.
The urge to vomit all over yourself is good!
Some people would go as far to say that you should always be uncomfortable. I don't know if I would go that far because one may lose their sanity living in a state of constant uncertainty. But living with a little fear never hurt anyone. In fact, I think it's quite healthy!
I like to think people get airsick on planes not because of the motion or altitude, but because they are taking flight! That they are about to embark on new territory. To journey unfamiliar grounds. And that's both scary and thrilling.
So I urge you to break out of your comfort zone. Whether that involves writing with complete transparency and vulnerability or taking some giant leap in your life that has caused your stomach to flip-flop for days, weeks, months or even years - DO IT!
And when you feel the urge to vomit, you'll know you're living right.
17 comments:
"Real life begins at the end of your comfort zone." - E. Roosevelt
How true!
This might sound a bit silly, but your post hits a bit close to home for me because besides wanting to take a leap of faith and getting out of different comfort zones in my life (aka not being afraid), I also have a severe phobia of throwing up (!), so it's double the discomfort/"uncomfortability" for me!
But, all in all, I agree - can't live in a total sate of uncertainty, but facing FEARS and leaving behind certain comforts gives way to so much LIFE. Real life and experiences and joy. Fear just holds us back, all the time.
I hope you will finish and publish the post soon! Can't wait to read it.
So, so true. I've been vomiting all over myself since the 4th grade. I just took a huge jump into life and moved to NYC. I've stopped vomiting quite so much, but I'm far from comfortable. I don't really plan to ever be too comfortable. I plan on living across the world and never being still.
Looking forward to reading your vomit inducing post!
I'm going to work on that vomit inducing post a little more tonight. And hopefully finish it...without puking all over myself.
what a great post! :) Don't ever get comfortable - that's what I tell myself all the time! :) Thanks for sharing :)
This post truly resonates with my current work! I am trying to shift a "paradigm" around information and running into resistance at both ends that tell me, "maybe this is stupid". Yet, I find when I embrace the fear and follow my values things work out! Thanks for this post!
Wonderful post!
The fact that you are uncomfortable and feel like vomiting are telltale signs that it is going to be a great post! I look forward to reading it on when your new blog is up and running.
No pressure, though.
once again a beautiful post:)
You know i found that for me, its a safety habit, and breaking is challenging but not impossible. There is no room for growth or fulfillment if you stay there.
Great reminder and Ill remember to keep my breath fresh :)
I feel connection through your writing :) Its inspiring :)
That is a HUGE compliment - thank you!
Above all else, what I really want is for people to feel a connection with what I write. Love that!
This applies to me mainly when I find myself in situations where I have to address a whole room of people, give a speech, or am just about to. I shiver really bad that people must see the tremors literally from meters away. My being aware of my condition doesn't let me lessen and modulate it anyhow--it's not something I can control. So there were those times in large classes when my prof would throw a question and I knew just what the answer was and my body would start shivering in anticipation of my reciting in class. But I still would raise my hand and answer, I'm grateful my voice doesn't normally quaver. The idea of reciting is what makes me uncomfortable and in deference to your article, I think of this every time it happens in terms of practicality. I'd already felt miserably uncomfortable even just considering the possibility of reciting, so I thought I'd rather proceed with it rather than back down and then to only have shivered so badly for nothing.
:)
Hi David-
I just discovered you on Scribnia and just read so much of your wonderful blog when I should be working (however, as a respected and high-powered middle manager, I've decided that if noone has discovered how much time I a)Spend on facebook b)Spend on writing my own blog and c)Reading The Huffington Post, they never will.
Very timely that this post is the one I read first. I have something I've already written and posted on my blog, Part I of the magnum opus story of a suiced, the that I am dreading that Part II. I am so afraid of what it's going to do to me that I can't quite do it yet. Part I was posted almost a year ago so I've got to get going on it.
Last week, I sent something to another blogger who posts letters that people wish they could send that they never have (or would.) It took me all of three minutes to compose, and when I re-read it, I feel sick to my stomach.
If you are so inclined, check out I Love You Claudine Part I on my blog--mylifeinthemiddleages.blogspot.com and let me know what you think.
I'm glad I found you.
Gayle, I'm glad I found you too!
Just got done reading the post you mentioned. And "wow" doesn't even being to summarize it. Incredible story!
All I gotta say is wild hearts can't be broken!
WOW! How inspiring to read! First of all, you jump from topic to topic, whatever is on your mind, and I LOVE IT! :) Your most recent post, though, seems to make soooooo much sense! I get that feeling, and I think I walk away too much to not feel that feeling when I should just "Vomit"...I think I would feel a WHOLE lot better about myself! I will continue to follow you and your craziness (good thing) because I beleive you just might be a person that can get into my head....(which is a rare occasion for anyone!) Thanks!!!!!!
Your post inspired my first blog post in over a month! It might not be as eloquent but I thought I would share what you inspired :)
http://intimate-ramblings.blogspot.com/2011/08/when-you-feel-urge-to-vomit-youre.html
Awesome post!
I think that the feeling of vomit on certain things makes the difference between living and living intensely.
But what about the people who just seem to be happy with everything in live and never strive for anything else, I am sure they still feel they are living right. Do you have to have a certain ambition and temper within you to be able to feel the vomit?
kath
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